For non-Australian readers, Centrelink is the government agency responsible for handling pensions, unemployment benefits, and most other government payments. The Department of Veterans Affairs handles payments to war veterans and their families, and the Australian Taxation Office handles tax refunds. But I digress.

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I’ve dealt with Centrelink a few times over the years, and over that time I’ve figured out some things you can do to help you get what you want. Or if what you want is absolutely positively not allowed, the best result the rules do allow.
- Come prepared. Take the relevant paperwork with you and things will go much faster. Even if it’s information Centrelink already have, looking at the paper in front of you is faster than looking it up in their computers.
- Arrive at appointments 5 minutes early. This shows that you are serious about getting a result, as opposed to turning up because they forced you to.
- Be polite. Many Centrelink customers get angry when things don’t go their way. I’ve found that being polite gets you results much faster. Polite people are much easier to deal with. Thank everybody you speak to, even if they weren’t helpful (thank them for their time).
- Be patient. Centrelink offices are often under-funded and under-staffed, and their computer system is really seven or eight systems held together with the digital equivalent of duct tape and chewing gum. So sometimes things take a while.
- If you’re having trouble navigating the electronic phone system, swear into the phone. The system detects swearing and other signs of frustration and puts you through to a real person almost immediately. I know this goes against the previous point, but the automated phone system isn’t a person.
- Do your research. Often they don’t tell you about all the payments you may be entitled to. For example, pensioners can get an extra allowance if they’re studying part time. Anybody can get rent assistance if their rent is over a certain portion of their income.
- If you’re not sure if you’re eligible for a payment, apply anyway. The worst that can happen is your claim is rejected and you’ve lost a bit of time. The best – you get some extra money.
- Tell them everything – income you earn, prizes you win, changes in relationship status, even volunteer work. It all has potential to change your entitlements, and it’s much easier to tell them up front than to follow it up later.
- If you don’t speak or understand English, get an interpreter for all appointments. There’s a shortage of interpreters so they will try to discourage you from doing this, but you have the legal right. A professional interpreter will make sure you understand everything and is much better than bringing a friend or family member, even if they’re fluent in your language. (My wife is deaf, so we always get an Auslan interpreter. Before we started doing this, she missed a lot of what was said, even though I tried my best to interpret for her. Having a professional interpreter is so much easier, and it’s a legal right.)
- If all else fails, ask to be refered to another Centrelink officer. Some of their staff just have bad attitudes and don’t want to help you – one person I used to deal with regularly seemed to hate unemployed people. If you come up against a bad attitude like that, remember you can report them to the people higher up the management chain. Go all the way to the Administrative Appeals Tribunal if you have to, but it shouldn’t come to that.
And there you have it – my quick(?) guide to dealing with Centrelink and getting the best result the rules allow. Got a tip I haven’t mentioned here? Leave it in the comments.